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  • Writer's pictureFiona O'Farrell, LMFT

Knowing what to do and say when…

Updated: Dec 16, 2023

"Someone call a therapist!"

Does this statement sound familiar to you?

One of the things I love about my job is that it is infinetely unpredictable, and I am constantly encountering new problems in my relational practice. At times, I have found myself sitting in a session wishing that the "real" couples therapist would show up and handle the case because I had nothing in my training that prepared me for the situation. The Developmental Model helped me understand that regardless of the situation, our clients often reveal information that cues us to know what to do or say whatever may arise.

The Developmental Model helped me to know what to do or say when...

Yes, the end of that sentence is left intentionally blank because, through the Developmental Model, I have learned that the situation does not dictate the following action of the therapist. Instead, I rely on cues. Cues that I start to collect from the initial phone call with couples. Cues from each member about wht they ultimately want and how they get in their way. Cues from how they respond to effective confrontation. Cues about the internal struggle they encounter in their relationship. We see cues from the language many couples use during therapy. The situation is predictable when you look for the indicators of how members of a couple present in treatment.

That's the third reason and final I am excited to bring the Developmental Model to you... to train you to identify cues that will help you always to know what to stay, whatever the situation.

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